So choking the chicken at the bus stop is fine, but Allah forbid your meat isn’t halal.Worried that this year might shape up to be a solo-Valentines? Well, if you’re in Sweden, why not take yourself out for a wild night on the town?

According to the Södertörn District Court’s 2013 ruling, so long as you aren’t pleasuring yourself to a particular person or group of people while out and about, you are free to wank to your heart’s and arthritis’ content.Poor guy.

“The district court has made a judgment on this case, with that we can conclude that it is okay to masturbate on the beach.” At the time Public Prosecutor Olof Vrethammar had called the court’s ruling reasonable. “For this to be a criminal offense it’s required that the sexual molestation was directed towards one or more people.”

So, watch your step as you go down the streets of Stockholm. That might not all be snow.

Hey, with freedom comes personal responsibility.