If you have luxurious long locks, you might want to postpone that trip to Venezuela. Sure, we’re certain Maduro will allow you to live like royalty for a ten day stint, provided you bring a Louis Vuitton trunk or two of toilet paper, but even he, the great magician himself, can’t protect you from the roving Piranhas that will stop at nothing to snatch your hair.

Yup, it seems that Chicago’s currency has hit the city of Maracaibo, Venezuelan hard as the growing demand for hair extensions has awakened a new form of theft.

Piranhas, the street nickname for this new band of thieves, typically work in groups of two or more, composed of both men and woman that will hold unsuspecting travelers and natives alike, with the perquisite stellar hairdo of course, at gunpoint.The new way to show grams.

After they force their well-quaffed victim to pull their hair back into a ponytail, the Piranhas cut it and are on their way to resell that hair for anywhere between $500 and $800.

The fine Maracaibo Police Department is all over this situation though, issuing a warning for women to avoid wearing their hair “down or in a ponytail” until things blow over.

Right, so if women shouldn’t wear their hair down, or up in a ponytail, perhaps it is best they leave their hair securely in a State-run bank. What do you think, PDers?