The verdict is in from the world media: new Egyptian President and Muslim Bro-hood head honcho Morsi is like the best guy ever! The non-partisan brain children of the news world are practically urinating all over themselves in order to get all of the puff pieces out as soon as possible.

He’s a great guy! He spent years in California and he didn’t stone anyone! Unlike his US counterparts, he didn’t smoke pot, he just studied and studied, and that’s why he so uber smart now. Look at his name even. Morsi! Doesn’t that just sound like a super cool 90’s grunge band?


Morsi is such a great guy. Doesn’t he look just like your gynecologist? (Wait, I fly to Cairo every 6 months for my pap smears—-is that my gynecologist?)Morsi says, "Jews are the problem."

Did you see those specks of his? So chic! And that black belt gray trouser combo? Visionary!

Morsi and his 52% MANDATE button down are all about peace. He even has a peace sign tramp stamp on his backside. Now that’s commitment to peace! It’s not as if the media is telling only part of the story.

He loves to dance on Israeli corpuses . His favorite food is humus made from Israelis .

As much as PD and the Jewish state of Israel would love to believe that all of this media fawning over Morsi is well founded and accurate, we’re going to have to refer to Morsi’s own words on that bit.

If your Arabic is a little rusty, there’s fairly accurate subtitles, that shouldn’t send a chill running through your liver. Okay, it probably will, and full disclosure, you might break out in hives about this dude’s plans to take back Jerusalem, and wipe the sleep from Jewish eyes. Oh yeah, it’s true. Morsi’s such a grand slam for democracy.