Who out there is loving this overblown sequester? Ha, it’s fantastic. After nothing happened the first week, the powers that be got together and said, “Time to start cutting holidays. The Easter Bunny is Union. Michelle’s been gunning for Halloween since 2009, and who the fuck cares about Independence Day?”
We’ve heard through the grapevine that the Obama Administration sent Louis Farrakhan to negotiate with Jolly Ole’ Saint Nick, and that they’re going to stop raising the flag every morning at the White House—it’s just too extravagant.
Anyways it is Monday, and so for today’s Memory Lane we thought we’d play a little game called So Worth the Expense, where we take one member of the ruling elites, and compare a few of their brighter moments with the charges of their upkeep.
Let’s start with Everyman Vice President Joe Biden.
PD’s mentioned his little run in with Senator Chuck Graham in a previous Monday, but were you aware of his first words out on the campaign trail back in August of 2008? “A man I’m proud to call my friend. A man who will be the next President of the United States — Barack America!”
The American taxpayers forked over $585,000.50 to Hotel Intercontinental during his one night in Paris January stay.
Then there’s his great grasp of historical facts. “When the stock market crashed, Franklin D. Roosevelt got on the television and didn’t just talk about the, you know, the princes of greed. He said, ‘Look, here’s what happened.”
During that aforementioned trip, Biden also enjoyed a little stopover in London. His Hyatt Regency stay followed the tune of $459,388.65.
Or his technological prowess, “You know, I’m embarrassed. Do you know the Web site number? I should have it in front of me and I don’t. I’m actually embarrassed.” We all are.
It seems that first little excursion of his second term, to the European Continent was a tad much on the taxpayers coffers, especially considering that $321,665 was spent in Paris alone on limo service.
Of course, who can possibly compete with him when it comes to the diplomatic handling of international affairs? When speaking with Irish Prime Minister Brian Cowen about Cowen’s mother. “His mom lived in Long Island for ten years or so. God rest her soul. And- although, she’s- wait- your mom’s still- your mom’s still alive. Your dad passed. God bless her soul.”
Well, while God is blessing Cowen’s mother, the taxpayers are blessing Biden with luxury weekends.
Every Friday, Biden takes a helicopter from the vice president’s residence to Joint Base Andrews in Maryland. There he ditches the helicopter for the stealthier and less ostentatious Air Force Two, which he takes to his home in Delaware. Come Sunday, he returns on Air Force Two.
On those nice Spring and long Summer Saturdays though, Uncle Joe returns to Andrews by plane to play a bit of golf at the Air Force base with Dear Leader. After a few holes, he flies back to Delaware.
The cost of flying Air Force Two is $22,000 an hour, so each half-hour trip to or from Delaware costs about $10,000. Each golf game costs taxpayers $20,000, which puts the yearly cost over $1 million.
Thanks for playing!