It seems the Jolly Fat Man is having a rather rough season this year. Whether it’s the US government going after his production lines in an epic battle of regulation, or the TSA scooping up his pocket change, Ole’ Kris Kringle is having some truly rotten luck.
Case in point, the over 260 pounds of marijuana that fell from his magic sleigh somewhere over San Diego while he was en-route to the good little Tijuanan boys and girls of the drug cartels late last month.
The said bundles of weed were ruled to have the depressing estimated street value of $157,000. That type of dough could buy a lot of cookies.
Supposedly these pot-drops are becoming more and more common, as cartels in a bid to corporate up, are embracing the office tradition of secret Santas with gusto.
In other drug cartel related news, the bigwigs at the top of the cartel food chain have also started diversifying into the ore business by exporting mined iron ore to Chinese mills.
The former head of the country’s top domestic intelligence agency (the Centro de Investigación y Seguridad Nacional), Guillermo Valdes Castellanos, breaks it down this way, “This is the terrible thing about this process of (the cartel’s) taking control of and reconfiguring the state. They managed to impose a Mafia-style control of organized crime, and the different social groups like port authorities, transnational companies and local landowners, had to get in line.”
Didn’t Kim Jong-Un also ask for some iron ore for Christmas, or did ordering the assassination of his uncle, Jang Song Thaek, land him on the naughty list?