Political Dresser

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Keeping It Classic

Red nails, a classic staple.So, you say Marijuana decals aren’t your mani style. We here at PD understand completely. Truth be told all of our contributors were surveyed and none have actually gone for the whole Nacro-Patron-Saint-thing; of course, no one on our staff plans to party in Cabo with the Zeta’s either (your political fashion choices are sometimes based on necessity).

While summer cobalts and neon pinks don’t suit everyone, a red manicure is a go-to staple that fits every skin type, hair color, personality, and time of year. Blood red in fall, cheery Santa in December, Valentine crush in February, Candy-Apple in Spring, and Hot Hot Hot in summer, red nails always come across as current and yet classic. 

The drawback to red? Other than the color almost being destroyed during the last decade with the failed YUPPIE, eco-AIDS (PRODUCT)RED Campaign is the yellow nail staining that comes from using such a hard color. Overtime, if just constantly reapplied and painted over, those stained nails can become a major eyesore.

Don’t rend your garments in dismay though, PD has an insider secret that takes the yellow tint away almost immediately.

Lemons.

No, this isn’t some pseudo-psycho life lesson that tries to empower you to cope with yellow stained fingernails, a global depression, and coming economic slavery, and oh yeah, those work and reeducation camps. No, we seriously mean lemons. Celebrate! There's a cure for yellow staining!

Take a lemon. Cut it in half. Put your talons and claws into the sliced halves for five minutes.

Full disclosure: Those five minutes can feel like an eternity, especially with your fingernails stuffed in a lemon. PD recommends queuing up some classic TV before you start. Do not turn on CNN or any other news station, as most likely in your haste to change the channel you’ll end up soaking your remote in lemon juice.

After those five minutes, rinse your hands off with cold water, and bam! Your nails will be a healthy pinkish-pearl hue. You’re welcome.

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