Political Dresser

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Genius Idea: Ban Beach Bags

Summer beach wear.None of these are fit for Cannes, according to Mayor David Lisnard.Hey, it’s technically still July (even in the Southern Hemisphere), but don’t worry, we agreed to embrace freedom yesterday and we’re not going back on that.

It is however Friday, the time of the workweek where our staff spotlights a bit of Big Government brilliance that never really hits an uplifting note---apart, of course, from last week’s ode to Senator Ted Cruz for standing his ground in Cleveland.None of these are fit for Cannes, according to Mayor David Lisnard.

This week we’re talking about beach totes being banned in Cannes, France and we’ll see if we can put a positive spin to it.

Citing the recent Daash terror attacks in France and the État d'urgence, yesterday the Mayor David Lisnard banned non-transparent bags.

Yes, apparently terror starts with canvas totes.

Also banned are bags big enough to conceal weapons, an odd call since basically weapons can be tiny which would rule out any clutch on the market, though most media sources have taken bags big enough to conceal weapons to mean backpacks and suitcases.

You can still fit a lot of C4 into this Edie Parker.Well, it’s a good thing that people usually don’t take a lot of stuff with them to the beach…like gigantic towels, bottles of sunblock, leave-in conditioner spray, brushes, books, changes of clothes, snacks, selfie sticks, chap-stick, coolers of sandwiches and drinks, caftans, water-shoes (hey---have you been to Cannes lately? Water-shoes make a hell of a lot of sense), tanning oil, metal detector, a bucket and spade, fans, etc.How great are the beaches in France anyway?

So, is the positive spin here that essentially you’ll lower your risk of skin cancer by passing up the beach and all of its new regulations this summer? Thereby providing you extra months on your life to evangelize on the wonders of freedom?

Maybe? Right? Leave us what you think, PDers, down in the comments. 

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People in this conversation

  • Guest (Braidy412)

    I wouldn't go to France..............that's where the French are. :D

    0 Like
  • Guest (Fika)

    I don't really see @Braidy412's humor, Cannes though thought to be the beaches of the rich and famous really isn't that nice to begin with.

    0 Like
  • Guest (Shawn)

    These types of regulations just make me want to find a different private/secluded beach.

    0 Like
  • Guest (Devon1982)

    Wait. So if I have a transparent bag and in that bag I have a beach towel and a gun wrapped in that towel, is that okay?

    0 Like
  • Guest (Filip)

    How many people have canceled their holidays to France this last year because of these attacks? That's a very real and hard economic impact. If you want to show ISIS/ISIL then go. Do not be threatened.

    0 Like

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