Political Dresser

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Get Your Gold Grills Or Maybe Don't

Show us your gold grill!Fashion and the economy are step-sisters, kind of related, feed off each other, and fight constantly. Therefore based on that, PD is always quick to keep a close eye on investments, well that, and the fact the PD’s staff are people too, and don’t much like getting screwed by State Bonds and taxes on carbonated beverages.

Below is Part 1, of a multi-part series called: What Not to Invest In

Contrary to leftist geezer, Warren Buffet and his paid media yes-men, PD believes that gold isn’t only a relic formerly used by Jews during the time of the holocaust, and is definitely something to be owned by civilized people in today's economy. Have you seen the EURO lately? The dollar? Come on, people. The sky is near free-fall, so gold is a great way to diversify.

The thing about investments, especially in gold, is that you have to be a bit clever. Putting your gold ventures onto your teeth for example, is less than clever.

Gold grills, hip-hop’s contribution to American culture, began as a joke status symbol back in the Give-Me-Give-Me 1980’s. While grills can be made from a mold of the wearer’s mouth, in accordance to a Junior High retainer, modern gold grills are made in more of a one-size fits all type deal. These gold grills can be bedazzled with diamonds, etc.


Exhibit BWhy aren’t gold grills a good investment? Well, it’s for the same way you should never go through your wallet and count your bills on a busy New York street: you’re going to get your ass robbed.

The same principal goes for your teeth décor. That friendly smile of yours attracts more than honeys. It attracts big burly dudes with names like, Puncher and Crushy, that have drugs to buy and mortgages to pay.

The Recovery Summers of 2009, 2010, and 2011 have all resulted in massive increases in gold grill robberies. Another interesting factoid is that along with a jump in sells of hoodies after Trayvon Martin achieved Saint Hood from Rev. Al Jackson, a similar jump in sells was seen with gold grills. Grills are so Trayvon.

While some of you out there might not want to part with the street cred given to you by your gold grill, it’s probably for the best.

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